My story with passions and hobbies - how I stopped doing them and saw a decline in my mental health.

They have played an important role in my recovery. When becoming unwell in 2017 I stopped doing a lot things that I use to do. I was spending most of my time worrying about things, and I deteriorated late in 2017 and ended up in a day hospital. I always viewed going on adventures as my big passion in life. I'm glad I could have that but even when I was unwell it was hard to do.

I would also previously do other things before becoming unwell: like gaming, watching movies, tv shows, researching into topics that interest me. As well as collecting things - like new music etc. I spent most of my time doing things. However in late 2017 when I was worrying all the time. I stopped doing most of this. I struggled with a lot of depression so found it hard to get back into things that I use to enjoy, even after I stopped worrying as much.

It was a gradual process. However I believe trying to get enjoyment was one of the ways that helped me recover from my mental health in particular all the depression I was facing. I met a mental health worker that told me two things that are important for helping depression are: a sense of purpose and getting enjoyment.

First I started getting back into my big passion, that was the easiest as this is what always I viewed my life as about before becoming unwell. This was great for a year and a bit and helped me cope with my mental health.

Unfortunately, I then stopped being able to cycle or walk very far in 2019, due to sciatica and knee issues. This had a big impact on my mental health and I found it harder to cope with my mental health due to not being able to do what I use to do. Plus I had primary pain (actual pain) and a lot of what I see now as unnecessary secondary pain (all the worrying that things would never improve and my life is 'not the same' etc). As a result of all this my mental health declined and I dealt with more depression.

When I went on holiday with family to New Zealand in 2020 I spent a lot of my free time thinking of things I could do when I'm back. I was in a better place on holiday so anything that came to my head no matter how small I would write down on the google docs app on my phone. Then when I was home I had a big list of things I could try. I made lists of things that I use to like doing as well.

I then started adding hobbies and interests to my life at a comfortable rate. I tried exploring different hobbies from time to time. This was helpful trying out different things as before I felt like all my eggs were in one basket. At first trying new things was hard to do because I would rather not waste any energy on something that I may not like then feel worse but I feel it was worth it. Having multiple things I could do throughout the day rather than just one hobby was great for me, especially as I could no longer cycle.

I created a photographic chart of things that I have enjoyed doing to help motivate me to try new things and get enjoyment back in my life. I worked on this for years, and in fact I'm still working on it.

If anyone is interested in viewing the list of things I've enjoyed you can download it here. (Posting it in case it can inspire you to make your own):

Also nowadays after slowly building distances up and bit of physiotherapy I have been able to get back into walking. I've done many hiking trips.

If you're someone that feels you may lack hobbies or passions and you want to find some but aren't sure what to do. I have another suggestion which could be helpful to you, which I talked about in my work and volunteering page, is using an AI service like chatGPT. Recently I typed in all my hobbies and interests of mine that I spent some time writing down. (The more you write the more AI has to work with). I then asked AI to give me a large list of other hobbies and things I could try out. Normally how chatGPT works is they give you around 10 suggestions. Therefore what I did instead was reask AI to give me like 100+ suggestions and then copy all of them and delete all the ones that I'm not interested in. I did this recently and I found a bunch of new interests that I could try out which I will do at some point. I view dealing with my mental health as a continual journey. I'm always looking to improve my mental health and keep myself well and if there's something else that I can add to my life which will help me I feel then I view it as worth it.